I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize