So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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