Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
