I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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