hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize