I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
