The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
