we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Randomize
