That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize