so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
