If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
