just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Randomize
