did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
