I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize