so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize