I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
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