did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
