Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
