He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I wear drunk well.
Randomize