I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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