After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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