dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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