i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
