Non-Jews are for practice
Do vagina's smell?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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