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His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
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