Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize