So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
