I'm sorry my penis didn't work
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
