Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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