I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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