Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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