I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
