so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
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