I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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