sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
