I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
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