How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
