He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize
