I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
