I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
