doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
