I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
You've changed since you got that strap on
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
