She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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