He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
