do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
