I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize