she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
