Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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