and she was petting her beer can
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
