He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
