id be glad to
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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