did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize