you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
