Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize